We went back to Leveque today. I got more footage of the trip in and out that should be good for the doc. We spent the day working on planting candilamb and painting in the houses again. There was some tension amoung the Haitian workers for a small part of the day, but it must have been resolved.

It was another good day in Haiti. We went home and I started to feel a little lonely again…I tried to work on a lesson but was unable to come up with anything until late at night.

We played picturephony and I once again felt inadequate, but I managed to get some nice DOF shots for the doc. It was a good day…but there isn’t much going on of note…I didn’t do much for the doc today and was just completely absent minded all day.

Went to Haitian church today. It was a blast. I am constantly being reminded of the Weston family. It breaks my heart a little to know that they lived here. I wonder where they were happier.

I didn’t see Mackee at church this morning. I hope that I didn’t just miss her in the crowd. I was looking at all of their faces trying to find her. I made a friend who sat with me during the whole church service. I never got his name but we sat together the whole service. I tried to sing along with all of the Haitian songs that I could. Hopefully it didn’t distract other worshippers.

We had a great lunch…I have been eating a lot again. Because it was election day we were unable to go out of the compound because of safety concerns, so we just stayed around the mission and played basketball and spent some time with the kids. I probably should have spent more time with them, I never know what to do though. I guess I should be stretching myself in that way all the time.

I shot a time-lapse of some clouds at dusk. I need more practice I guess…it didn’t turn out very well. I changed too many things at once. Today was an uneventful day other than that.

I met Lee from Canada and we talked for a while on a mountaintop while time-lapsed…

You know my heart God, and you know what I need. Also any time I could stop looking like a fool that would be good…I seem to always open my mouth and stick my foot right in.

Help me to create something that honors you. Show me where to put the camera and how to take the shots. Guide my hands and remind me that the credit is yours.

Today was all about Mackee. I met her in Titanyen today…and for whatever reason she was drawn to me, she walked up and grabbed my hand after we had been there for a while. She took me to the other side of the “bible school” and just wanted to spend time with me I guess. We couldn’t say anything that we both understood, but we could both smile.

She had a beautiful smile, but her eyes often had a hint of sadness in them. I have seen the same look in Matthews eyes this week. It is solemn…it must be a look that God wears a lot. It is almost as her eyes knew more then they ever should.

We held hands and cuddled in that special way that I have never experienced before. It was an innocent child/brotherly affection that I haven’t really experienced before.

She found the cross necklaces while she was unzipping some of my bags. She grabbed one and I helped put it on her. Soon we had developed a system. I would put the camera away and she would zip it back up. It was adorable. She watched out for me and was trying to protect me when she could. She was jealous for my attention. She asked me to sit down so she could play in my beard and do my hair.

Today was a great day.

I still feel inadequate but that is not the point. I guess it all goes back to the verse ” I must decrease so that God can increase.”

Wasn’t thrilled when we started the day…felt like a jerk with all the various stuff I am carrying. I suppose that is okay though. Met a fella named Adam who wanted to talk cameras for a while…it was fun but I was a little prideful about stuff I think. Mortify the pride in me God.

Felt like God was saying no to the big camera rig…I almost didn’t listen but am glad that I did.

Had a great day in Haiti 500 (Leveque)…lots of good pictures. We saw the house that we helped pay for. It was exciting to see the fruit of our labor. God had even arranged for the house with the address of 127 to be blue…God is amazing. It was good to see a whole town full of the Samaritan houses as well.

There were half naked nationals all around. It was a shock, but not as embarrassing as I was afraid it would be. There were people washing there clothes in the ditch beside the road. Many of them were naked. Water is a huge part of life here in Haiti, and there is never enough. Charity:Water could do huge things here.

I have almost wept many times today. Especially when thinking about beautiful things I saw done through the day. Help me to be a better worker God. I was not as active as I could or should have been.

It is my natural state to draw away from social interaction. I am learning to ask questions though. Even when I am not filming. I still feel a little lonely, but that is okay I guess.

Today was a great day. I was very moved to see the shelter results.

Haiti Day 1
We left for Haiti today and are en route to Detroit. I was running behind as usual with camera stuff, but am pretty happy with how the rig turned out so far. We will see if it survives the week or not. I don’t have a proper screwdriver, but it is what it is.

My prayer for the hour is that I would stay out of the way and not be a distraction to the team and others. God give me the wisdom to know when to pick it up and put it down. It has been A long day so far, but I am trusting god to give me strength until we hit our temporary home. Hopefully I can nap on the airplane.

…I must have napped more then I thought. Everyone else is exhausted and I am ready for another hour or two. I already feel some tension among some of the team. Which is unfortunate but not unexpected. I may have hurt rachels feelings when I joked about the sunset not happening in the morning and it was completely unintentional. Help me not to make an enemy of Rachel or anyone else on the team. Show me how to reach out. I didn’t do interviews tonight…if I could go back and do it over I would grab interviews while we were waiting for supper. I need to just grab them when I can instead of waiting around. I didn’t eat very much for supper, but I know I will be fine for a while. Eventually I think we will have a chance to eat something significant.

I am not sure what I think about my purpose here…did I not listen to God and just go because I could?

Every thing I saw just reminded me of Nicaragua. It seemed a little worse I guess, but it is the same general theme.

I need to worry less about what people think of me…and more about what God has for me. I wish I knew what to do… I feel pretty alone and like I am bothering people.

Anyways Bob the founder shared a challenging message that I enjoyed.